If
you want to manage your stress and generate happy feelings, you cannot give away
your power to professionals. Educators, doctors and therapists can reign in your
spirit and inhibit your natural ability to come up with creative solutions. For
example, the Journal of the American Medical Association cites that doctors are
bribed by pharmaceutical salesmen who do not know much science, but are well-versed
in marketing strategies.
Some
of the bribes are hefty and luxurious, like vacations, tickets to shows and dinners,
and others are small gestures, free samples and pens. Nevertheless, a doctor overtly
or subtly feels obligated to prescribe a particular medicine and you become the
guinea pig. Bowing your head to authorities began at school where you learned
the text and received a grade to ensure you performed according to standardized
testing one size fits all.
However
when you reflect on it, the more educated you became, the less creative your thinking,
the less likely you could improvise and invent. Why? Because your mind had been
confined by limited associations, shaped to conform.
I
remember in graduate school many of my classmates suffered from Brights
Disease, or in other words, Straight A Idiocy. They would speak and write in as
many syllables as possible to sound intelligent. However, often the communication
was incomprehensible and could have simply been summed up in a sentence
if they really understood what they were saying. As for me, I learned what not
to do! And perhaps, that is the key when you are stuck and have lost control:
To approach a thing from its opposite perspective.
To
manage your daily stress and feel reasonably happier you need to broaden your
associations and liberate your mind from the blind respect you have given teachers,
parents and professionals people pleasing. Try to cross over to the opposite
side and break with your original assumption to see it from another perspective.
For
example, a typical assumption might be that your doctor is doing the right thing
to lower your cholesterol with a statin.
Now
look at this assumption from the other side. Your doctor is prescribing a statin
to generate income because you will have to take blood tests and come in for frequent
checkups. He is insuring a future cash flow. However, a healthy meal plan with
lean protein, fruits and vegetables, plenty of fiber along with daily exercise
does not generate any frequent doctor visits and more income, so statins are prescribed
instead of a healthy lifestyle.
Be
aware that there are so many miserable, divorced therapists telling you what to
do to improve your relationship with your spouse; so many diet books out there
to telling you what to eat and when to eat, yet Americans are fatter than ever.
Everyone is trying to take charge of your mind and your money! How do you sort
it all out?
Start reading life! Learn by listening and observing. Life is filled with inconsistencies
and absurdities. These inconsistencies will help you understand the whole picture
or at least know that there are other options to pursue.
Be
aware of body language as well as what is said and not being said to you. Pay
attention and keep asking questions about all the options. Dont feel intimidated
by a lab coat or a degree.
Expose
yourself to other places, people and cultures. Step out of your narrow context
to learn new information and new ways of thinking. At some point you might intersect.
For example, Americans are enamored with herbs and meditations from the Far East.
The Far East is enamored with our radiation treatments and capitalism. An exchange
of ideas can intersect and breed new possibilities like complementary medicine.
Take
responsibility for your mind and body. You know how you feel and what you need
to heal. Dont let doctors objectify you, decide for you and rush you out
the door. Partner your own healing. Read about your symptoms. Let the doctor know
what is going on in your life. Emotions can make you sick and tired. Get other
medical opinions. Listen and make the decision that feels right to you in your
gut. If it isnt working, get another opinion and do more reading; try something
else. Most doctors admit that medicine is an art. Become an artist.
Keep
in mind that people love to give other people advice because it gives them power
and dominance, but these sages rarely take their own advice. This
can only mean that the advice is suspect, or works in theory, but not in reality.
Take back your power. You know what is right for you! Do you really need a nutritionist
to tell you not to eat all those French Fries, a bucket of fried chicken and an
ice-cream sundae in one meal, or do you know what to do? Do you need a marriage
counselor to tell you not to always bring up the past every time you argue with
your husband?
Get
creative and use your imagination to find a personal, tailor-made solution to
your specific problem. The answer might be counterintuitive or surprisingly simple.
About
the Author Debbie
Mandel, MA is the author of Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind
and Soul, a stress-reduction specialist, motivational speaker, a personal
trainer and mind/body lecturer at Southampton College. She is the host of the
weekly Turn On Your Inner Light Show on WHLI 1100AM in New York City ,
produces a weekly wellness newsletter, and has been featured on radio/ TV and
print media. To learn more visit
her site.
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